Category: Kindness

Antenatal education, Babies, Being busy as a midwife, Birth, Breastfeeding, Caesarean section, Change management, Children, Compassion, Courage, Helping others, Hospital, Human rights, Intra-operative care, Kindness, Labour and birth, Learning, Manual removal of the placenta, MatExp, Media, Midwife, Midwifery, Midwifery and birth, New parents, Newborn, Newborn attachment, NHS, NHS Systems and processes, Obstetrics, Patient care, Post traumatic stress disorder, Postnatal care, Respect, Skin to skin contact, Surgery, Teaching, Women's health, Women's rights, Young mothers, Young women

The natural caesarean / the gentle caesarean 

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There’s a debate on Twitter this morning about the ‘natural caesarean’ as a term that promotes a positive experience of birth by caesarean. I don’t agree with the term and I think as health care professionals working in the area of birth we should ensure that every birth is a positive birth . Milli Hill started the The Positive Birth Movement  with this goal in mind (@birthpositive on Twitter ) 

Bearing this in mind I’d like to ask the following questions for you to consider and share with with your colleagues, family , friends , midwives and obstetricians . 
1. How many women who have an emergency caeserean and/or instrumental birth (forceps or ventouse) are given information in the antenatal period about the far reaching health and psychological benefits of skin to skin contact in this setting to both mother and baby ? 

2. Compare the above with how many women are given information about  skin to skin contact around normal birth ? 

3. Compare both to how many woman are informed that skin to skin is possible during manual removal of placenta and repair of any perineal trauma in the theatre setting ? 

4. Are women informed 

  • They can TELL midwives to defer the weighing of their newborn in order to enjoy the benefits of prolonged skin to skin contact 
  • That they should never be separated from their baby unless a clinical situation becomes apparent or they themselves choose not to have skin to skin contact despite being FULLY informed
  • That their baby could ‘self latch’ at the breast without any handling by staff and also correct its own acidosis and stabilise its own breathing because of skin to skin contact ? 
  • That skin to skin and early breastfeeding “Pronurturance ” is linked to a reduction in the incidence of  postpartum haemorrhage?  CLICK RIGHT HERE for the Pronurturance paper 
  • That if babies could talk they would choose skin to skin contact despite their birth environment 
  • That skin to skin contact is the building block for a persons social and psychological development 

The midwives and staff on social media who talk about caesarean are not promoters of it , they are giving women information about choice – so that if the operation (which is major surgery) does take place then these women are able to not only enjoy their birth experience but give their relationship with their baby the best possible start . 

I suppose it’s similar to the question “does having a teenage pregnancy strategy increase teenage pregnancy rates ?  (and I much prefer the term  “young women”to ‘teenage pregnancy’) 

Does having full information about your choices if you do go on to have a caeserean increase caesarean rates ? I don’t know the answer to either of these questions but I do know that the women I have assisted and sometimes fought for to have skin to skin contact with their newborns in different birth situations have all told me this 

 
-that they never realised the positive impact it had on them as a successful mother

To me this is enough .   
Thank you for reading 

With love , Jenny ❤️

I am also promoting #MatExp as a platform which enables and encourages discussion between women, families and health care professionals . 

Antenatal education, Babies, Birth, Breastfeeding, Caesarean section, Change management, Children, Compassion, Courage, Discharge from hospital, Helping others, Hospital, Human rights, Intra-operative care, Kindness, Labour and birth, Learning, MatExp, Midwife, Midwifery, Midwifery and birth, New parents, Newborn, Newborn attachment, NHS Systems and processes, Obstetrics, Patient care, Postnatal care, Respect, Skin to skin contact, Surgery, Teaching, Women's rights, Young mothers

The Gentle Caesarean – Gentle with what ?

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Last year I was lucky enough to work in a general theatre for a week . I met a wonderful general surgeon and watched him perform bowel surgery . I noticed immediately how gentle and kind he was with the internal tissues and how calm and respectful he was not only towards the patient and his body , but also the staff in the operating theatre. All the staff admired this surgeon – you know when you can just tell ?  

I asked the surgeon afterwards about his technique and he said this

 “I always respect the tissue Jenny- tissues , blood vessels  , muscle and skin are part  of our human make up and being gentle with them means I am showing tissue respect and respect to the patient who is a fellow human . Being a gentle surgeon takes longer but believe me the outcomes are better and I know that there is less trauma , post-op bleeding , infection, pain and therefore happier patients and staff .”

Currently there is a lot in the news and emerging research around “The Gentle caesarean” and I am looking at this from a different angle  (and for those who know me well I don’t do acceptance well – I like to ask things so that others unable to ask might think differently ) so I am questioning what this term “Gentle Caesarean” actually means . Does Gentle Caesarean mean just the moment of birth or should it be right from the decision or choice of the woman to have an operative birth through to arriving home ? 

So for all those who work in the field of midwifery , obstetrics , intra-operative care, surgery , pain management -I would like you to watch a caesarean from start to finish and ask yourself “was that a gentle caesarean from that the moment that the woman arrived in theatre ? Was there gentleness with the woman’s feelings and choices ? Did the obstetrician, scrub midwife and others maintain gentleness towards the internal tissues and the to the baby? Was the transfer to the bed from the operating theatre table gentle ? Was privacy and dignity maintained at all times? 

Just because we have always done something a certain way does not mean that “the way” is always the best . 

I hope I spark someone to change practice and make “The gentle caesarean” standard across the NHS because then it will spread  globally – we must question on a  daily basis what we do and why we do it .
Thank you for reading , please leave feedback and / or share this blog with your colleagues 
With love and midwifery kindness , 

❤️Jenny❤️
Addendum today I am thrilled that The Times journalist Katie Gibbons has written an article about skin to skin contact at Caesarean  CLICK HERE to access or being the rebel that I am here’s a photo 😁

 

Bereavement, Courage, Grieving, Human rights, Kindness, Learning, Media, NHS, Post traumatic stress disorder, Respect, Women's rights

Aiming and succeeding – the journey of others  

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Today I’ve been reading a lot on the Internet and twitter about “The Secret” which is a dramatisation of real events that took place in Northern Ireland in 1991  -a tragedy that totally disrupted and still continues to affect the families of the victims . 

The courageous daughter of Lesley Howell (Lauren Bradford) tried her best to stop a programme going ahead . This programme has been advertised and aired on ITV as a “drama”. The drama is based on a tragic event that tore through the hearts of the families involved as well as their respective families and their friends . Lauren decided to make her own voice as well as others heard and wrote an outstanding, impactful letter to The Guardian about why she disagreed with the “drama” and the unforeseen effect of it being on aired on TV  would cause . The letter is  HERE. 

I feel that Lauren has written this letter to ROAR for her own mother  Lesley , a wonderful, strong, kind   and giving mother. Lesley’s voice was silenced by murder and so she cannot speak for herself about her life or how much her treasured children meant to her . Much more than this however Lauren has given other victims the chance to see that they too CAN  and MUST  speak out   – so in writing her wonderful letter she will have helped others to realise that their voices WILL  be heard . The media must no longer hold the power of ‘story telling the lives of others’  in order to make money or gain viewers or readers, they must realise that they don’t know the story so therefore it will never belong to them -it’s not their story after all is it?

Speaking out as a victim must be very difficult – which newspaper does a victim approach ?  Which TV company ? How does a victim ensure that their views enable others to empathise with their true story? Here’s how – be like Lauren   – write with truth and dignity in your heart. 

I am so immensely proud of Lauren  because through her words and thoughts she is actually helping others who may not be able to speak out to also have their voices heard . In addition to this Lauren is encouraging us all to think differently about how cases are reported and written about . How can it be right that a person can actually make money from someone else’s tragedy ? 

Thank you for reading and please leave your thoughts and comments on Lauren’s article . This will to help the media see there are two sides to every story .
❤️Jenny❤️

Antenatal education, Babies, Birth, Breastfeeding, Children, Courage, Helping others, Human rights, Kindness, Labour and birth, Midwifery and birth, New parents, Newborn, NHS Systems and processes, Patient care, Postnatal care, Skin to skin contact, Teaching, Women's rights, Young mothers, Young women

Memories of skin to skin contact 

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Those were the days weren’t they? Or were they ? 

This week I met up with a friend (pseudonym Niamh) who is a mother of four. She recounted to me each tender moment that each of her children was born . The last three were born by Caesarean section . “Did you hold them straightway?” I  asked .

Niamh replied “to be perfectly honest no – I held none of my children that were born by Caesarean section immediately in fact not for severel  hours ” Niamh then recounted to me the birth of her son – when he was about 6 hours old she had still not seen him properly and asked a midwife how he was doing – the midwife told her that he was fine but due to breathing problems he was in an incubator . SIX HOURS !! I want to add that no one had told her until she asked . 

If you are a midwife , an anaesthetist , an operating department practitioner or a theatre nurse. If you work in an operating theatre , or  if you teach those who do -I want you to think carefully about why we must all strive to keep mothers and babies together in the theatre setting . 

I know it’s becoming more common for skin to skin to happen and I realise that if it’s not happening that to fight the system and challenge separation is difficult but we must keep moving forwards  . The reason is simple – skin to skin makes babies happy and it makes mothers happy and feel like mothers . It reduces postnatal depression and admissions  to neonatal units , I’ve even seen it stabilise a mother’s parameters. There is new evidence emerging to show that in effect if Nimah had held her son straightaway he may not have been admitted to neonatal unit with breathing difficulties . 

Skin to skin is human nature – we must tell women why it’s important not just ask 

      “would you like skin to skin contact ?” 

We need to say

 “If you hold your baby immediately against your skin and WE will provide help and support . As a mother you can instantly reduce the chance of your baby producing  the stress hormone cortisol and this contact can and does have a positive nurturing effect that is invisible as it happening.

As health care professional we must practice evidence based medicine and skin to skin is evidence based . We are responsible for teaching why it matters – not just throwing it into a checklist, box ticking exercise . 

The ‘Niamh’ I am talking about is in her late 70s – her children ages range  from 38 to 48 years of age . Niamh recalls each birth , each separation  but even more than that she remembers her feelings of despair at wanting to see touch and smell her babies but feeling like she couldn’t ask . 

That to me puts it all into perspective .
If you’d like more evidence here is some of the latest publications 
Pronurturance 

http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1871519215003558

Skin to skin at caesarean 

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/14651858.CD003519.pub3/pdf/

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/mcn.12128/full 

I recommend you follow the following people and organisations so that you can converse  with those who are champions for skin to skin contact 

@JeniStevensS2S @CarolynHastie @HeartMummy @FWmaternitykhft @KathrynAshton1 @Natasha47 @Csectioninfocus @hannahdahlen @bloodtobaby @AAGBI 

Please take a look at my “skin to skin FB page”  for more resources 

https://www.facebook.com/Mother-Infant-contact-skin-to-skin-in-the-operating-theatre-setting-445225315630071/ 

Thank you for reading  #Keepgoing ❤️
With Love , Jenny ❤️

Charity, Children, Community, Gifts, Helping others, Kindness, NHS

✨My chosen charity – Barnardos✨

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This year I have been sorting through things that I no longer need, things that could be useful to others and donating them to my local Barnardos shop . A couple of weeks ago I was in the shop and I had a look around  realising that as well as donating I should be actually buying something to support this worthwhile charity . I spent £4.57 on two CDS , a candle , a model of a fisherman, (as I have a thing for the sea ) and a butter dish which I have decorated here is my tweet CLICK HERE to see the tweet. 

  

When I arrived home I started  thinking about the gifts we buy others and thought of the way the media portrays wealth and indeed how some see the need to show their wealth by displaying their possessions to the world . Some obscene purchases of the wealthy really irritate me when I see how many people live in poverty not just in underdeveloped countries but also in developed countries like right here in the good old UK .  One example that recently made me question the true value of wealth was the story of Kim Kardashians nappy bag – A bag worth over  £10k . Imagine living in poverty & seeing this kind of story splashed over the news most days , and the effect on a humans resilience to keep going . Wealth means more than actually having enough to live on – wealth is about learning , kindness, humanity , giving to others , realising there is only so much you can  own and also sharing with others . I feel rich every day because of the family & friends that I have . They give me gifts that are not tangible but yet make me feel like a rich woman . 

I enjoy some quiz shows and relish learning. Whilst I watching the Charity donation segments on some “celebrity versions” of well known quiz show,  I was struck by a thought

 “if celebrities can have a chosen charity then why can’t normal people like me?” 

 I then researched some charities and chose Barnardos because it is so much more than a charity it has actions and outcomes and this year is celebrating its 150th year . Click HERE to read more about the history of Barnardos, listen to children’s voices and experience the impact that the work of Barnatdos is having on so many lives .  

This year until the end of 2016 I am making Barnardos my chosen charity and I pledge to do the following 

  • Donate anything I no longer need to Barnardos 
  • Purchase all future birthday presents and Christmas presents until the end of the year from my local Barnardos shop as far as possible . If this is not possible I will go to the nearest Barnardos shop after this one 
  • If I need to buy anything for myself or my home I will always first look for it in my local Barnatdos shop before going to a mainstream retailer. 
  • I will tweet my purchases to prove to others that I am staying true to my pledge 

I challenge you all to find a chosen charity of your own to support for the rest of the year and to help you feel like you are making a difference . 

As Ghandhi said  “Be the change you wish to see in the world ” 

Thank you Barnardos from me for all the children in the UK whose lives you have touched and changed 

Thank you for reading 

❤️Jenny❤️

Babies, Birth, Care of the elderly, Community, Courage, Discharge from hospital, Discharge planning, Human rights, Kindness, Learning, Newborn, NHS, NHS Systems and processes, Nursing, Patient care, Skin to skin contact, Teaching

Processes within the NHS 

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There is a phrase “going around” that takes the impact of what it’s like to be an elderly person without support and this derogatory term totally dehumanises a very human situation. Talking about humans as processes instead of shouting out loud that caring does not start and begin in a hospital is like saying that once a person reaches 70 nobody really cares about them. The roots of care, compassion and indeed humanity itself  are intertwined into community , family life and neighbourhoods. Love and care begin at birth when the impact of instinctual kindness and love from one’s own mother is portrayed immediately at the moment of arrival by her display of emotions, indescribable craving and total need to hold her newborn child. It is my quest that every midwife, obstetrician and in fact anyone who is privileged to be there when a child is born knows this and thinks about it every second before birth occurs and is instrumental I helping to facilitate it or shout out when it doesn’t seem to be . 

NOW I’d like you to imagine that you are a senior NHS manager questioning your clinical leaders about how to address the problem of  “bed blockers” you are driven and you don’t tolerate excuses . Suddenly fast forward your own life – you are 79 years old and living alone . Your family live just far enough away from you to prevent a daily visit . You are isolated and feel depressed so gradually without any realisation of it , you stop looking after yourself . Your home becomes as uncared for as you are and then you fall . The reason for your fall is that you didn’t like the new slippers your granddaughter bought you for Christmas they were too much like shoes. You therefore continue to wear your old worn ones and on this particular day as you descend your steep unsafe-for-a-79-year-old stairs, your slippers “tread free” soles slip on the edge of a stair – suddenly you’re in flight mode. Your hip dislocates and your femur breaks – time to realise after your operation and recovery in a rehabilitation centre that you can’t get home. Mainly due to the fact that your family are away for a few days in France and social services have deemed your house as unfit for you to move back into . One particular day you are “sat out” in a chair behind some curtains and you overhear a Dr and an occupational therapist talking – your name is used and that familiar term “bed blocker” Is mentioned. The words ring in your ears from when you used to say them about others and now you are one. 

Did you know  when ambulance crews take patients to accident and emergency that they have to wait and cannot leave their charge until the care is taken over by the hospital team. I know this because last year  I worked with an ambulance team for a day . We were transferring a woman to another hospital & I was the escort midwife – once in another zone the ambulance was recognised on the radar and unable to leave each time a 999 call was made . It was like being in another galaxy unable to return to our own a sort of NHS antithesis to Brigadoon. So if SEVEN ambulance crews arrive at a particular Accident and Emergency department all waiting to handover the care of their patients -SEVEN ambulances are simultaneously  off the road-what’s to be done about this?

A few months ago I realised I was digressing from my ” #skinToSkin” work and asked a friend what I should do . Political issues were starting to interest me more , I felt more aware of care for people living with dementia . I had started reading about how mental  health issues are addressed and pigeon holed. Nick Chinn taught me about silos and I realised that the NHS works in silos. My friends reply was “keep going Jenny – as a NHS Midwife you have a duty to be political so that you can tell others about the day you spent with the ambulance  crew, why skin to skin matters to society and is a public health issue . To be frank I’d be more worried if you said you felt apolitical” 

So my friends let’s keep going and let’s keep championing good care , outing systems that don’t put the patient and/or family at the heart of what we do – one day that “bed blocker” might just be you . 

Thank you for reading please feel free to leave comments – your input helps me to reflect and develop as a midwife , mother and human . 

❤️Jenny ❤️

Antenatal education, Babies, Birth, Breastfeeding, Kindness, Labour and birth, Learning, Midwifery and birth, New parents, Newborn, NHS, Postnatal care, Skin to skin contact, Teaching, Young mothers, Young women

A little book of labour and L❤️ve  

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A while ago one of my dearest friends appeared at the front door of my home .When I say dear friend, she’s the kind of friend that you might not see for a few weeks or months yet when you do see her it’s just as if you saw each other yesterday- as if no time has passed since you last saw one another .You know what I mean – you both remain the same age as when you first met and restart  a conversation exactly where you left off . You know the kind of friend I’m talking about – one that will drop anything  anytime when he/she  hears those words “I need you”. That is exactly what she did for me and continues to do for me so many times I’ve lost count . She shows no judgment , never tells me what I “need to do” , doesn’t gossip and listens to me with true friendship and love in her heart for me , which is equally as strong as the love I have for her . 

Anyway back to the door – my friend was standing there and before she spoke I knew something was wrong , very wrong . I could tell in the wildness of her hair ,  the look in her eyes , the way she was standing and her sense of upset . I pulled her inside my home and hugged her . The news was that her 15 year old daughter “Verity” was pregnant .

We talked and I recalled a celebrity that once said ( I’m sorry but I’ve forgotten who it was) ….

” it might not be the right time or the right situation , but it will always be the right baby” 

I said those words to my friend , I listened , I didn’t tell her what to do I just gave her the love back that she’s always given me . 

The months went by and her daughter “Verity” (name changed for reasons of privacy)  was blooming , looking beautiful everything was going well . I sensed however that she was worried about labour and I decided to make her my “Little book for labour ”  I felt I had to do something to help her prepare in order to realise her own strength and to believe in her capability to give birth . I started the book I didn’t want to make it boring or prescriptive but fun and positive . I also realised the importance of going through the book , discussing induction of labour , vaginal examinations , acting on complications, early labour, food, and breastfeeding but most of all key support people and after the birth . 

So to sum up the book was a success with Verity . We held  a  “mini” Jen & Verity one to one antenatal group in my lounge which taught me things about not just what younger women want to know (perhaps women of all ages?) . I really don’t know if I could’ve written it in the same manner if I hadn’t made it especially for Verity . She calls me “Auntie Jen” so I wrote it not just as a midwife , but as her dear mum’s friend and as an “auntie”. 

Veritys baby is now over two years old and her birth was beautiful. I wasn’t there but my friend was ,they took the book in and read it . There were no complications and the birth was physiological . 

Last night I asked Verity if I could borrow the book back to look at it – I’d not seen it for over two years. Verity had kept it safe and sound – I was thrilled that she still had it . 

So here are a selection of pages from the book  – I am very proud of it but more proud of Verity and her beautiful daughter . It’s going straight back to Verity after I’ve published my blog.  (not her real name) 
Thank you for reading 
❤️Jenny ❤️

   
    
    
 

Babies, Birth, Courage, Kindness, Learning, Midwifery and birth, New parents, Newborn, NHS, Nursing, Patient care, Skin to skin contact, Women's rights

What Sparks Your Joy ?

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I enjoy making my home feel like a warm welcoming place to my family and to friends as well as to myself  . A calm happy home gives me the ability to relax as well as work hard. However, I do own some clutter and although my home is clean I have spots that need organising . So this week I bought the book “Spark Joy” by Marie Kondo- it is about keeping items in our homes that make us feel joyous and getting rid of things that do not . Whilst reading it I was suddenly struck to consider what “sparks my joy” in midwifery? What should I cherish love and hold onto ? 

I would keep public speaking/social media , being an advocate for women , MatExp and being a mentor. I would also extol the virtues of being a “radical” Here’s why 

Public speaking and Social Media 

I really didn’t realise this until I spoke at Uclan to the future midwives and then at the Breatfeeding Festival in Manchester. Truthful feedback is imperative to me as it enables me to develop and see myself through others eyes. My focuses as a speaker are to impart knowledge , learn myself , inspire others to leave feeling they can make a difference and change the way they seen themselves perhaps to consider presenting themselves . I have to feel a positive sense of connection with the audience and I make a solid effort to achieve this as  it’s definitely important to me that presenting is a two way process . I ask questions and I learn from the audience . As well as talking about my passion for midwifery I also openly admit that I can’t know everything . I like to involve humor and also poetry – I feel so happy when others laugh and learn with me . The other reason I love attending conferences is that I network with other midwives and people who have a shared goal in making the NHS and especially maternity services even better . I see one of my key roles as tweeting at a conference to share the experience and agenda with the global midwifery network . I have made many real friends through twitter and I will continue to reiterate Eric Qualmans words “We don’t have a choice on whether we DO social media , the question is how well we DO it” I am privileged to have just written a section in an article with Teresa Chinn MBE about this topic . Teresa’s website HERE and she is the founder of We Communities which has changed the digital face of nursing midwifery medical and allied health professionals on line . Click HERE to find out more . I never in a million years realised that Twitter would connect me with such a community of compassionate and driven people . Social media is a vehicle that helps us to share information, learn and enable . This immeasurable crucial part of the infrastructure of global healthcare gave me the courage to become a blogging midwife and connect with the MatExp team but even more reinvigorated my passion to learn even more about midwifery the NHS , leadership , kindness  and start to cherish my own long hidden rebelliousness . Through THE SCHOOL FOR HEALTH AND CARE RADICALS I e found it’s ok to be radical and that change takes time and committment – if you want to learn more join the next cohort which starry this February – you will not look back (click HERE ) 

Being a mentor 

My other joy is being a mentor I love to ask future midwives how I can facilitate their learning and yet learn from them . I see myself as a radical mentor I talk about, teach and observe for compassionate care , courage and good communication. When working with students of any discipline  I feel it’s so important to hear their voice and also to be honest to them about obstacles they may encounter to prepare them for their future roles . I am a truthful mentor and it’s just so crucial that the first meeting is positive. My goal is to melt their fear or apprehension as soon as we meet  – to let them know that I am a teacher, a learner  and also that I am helping them on a journey . I do like to give spontaneous teaching sessions and find it hard to contain my excitement when future midwives tell me about  new research or publication. Mentoring also includes being a role model to peers , newly qualified midwives and reaching out to give others  help, inspiration and guidance face to face as well as through social media. I have several key mentors in my life and career who assist me through coaching and reflection which in turn aids my development as a mentor .  I love to hear news from colleagues and students as well as sharing with them new things I’ve read via social media , recommend blogs or books  to read and upcoming conferences . 

An advocate for women 

I will have been a midwife for 23 years this June. I see myself as constantly evolving and realise that I will never reach my destination – I don’t want to though I want to keep growing each day . By having this approach I  hope that I am open to women’s families and colleagues voices .I extol the long term and short term virtues and benefits of skin to skin contact at any opportunity .  Being a midwife means being a strong communicator and embracing oneself as an ambassador for global women . It’s about being current and modern despite age or experience – this ethos should apply to all who work in the NHS . Choice and consent should be embedded into our role as advocates . Cotinuity of carer must be a priority plus a positive communicative relationship  between the midwives  and  women all embedded into what we do just as much as a building needs a roof , windows , a door and warmth .  

MatExp 

Mat Exp is all about maternity experience . It’s a change platform where anyone can participate , discuss and suggest new ways to assess , plan, implement and receive care – putting the family first in Maternity services . MatExp is also about staff who are involved in this specialty and how we can improve their experiences too. This is why I adore it – everyone has an equal and valid voice – there is no hierarchy and ideas are constantly flowing . MatExp HQ exists in a virtual digital sense – it’s everywhere and a testament to the true power of social media . Due to MatExp I’ve learnt more about PostTraumatic Stress Disorder due to birth trauma which can affect men as well as women . I understand  more about the feelings of families when their babies have been stillborn or died after birth . I have been able to connect with women, families, health professionals and radicals to  spread the word about why collaboration works because we are actually doing it  . I have also met the most amazing people from all walks of life and feel I have connected with them in making a difference . Just search #MatExp on twitter or take a look at the website HERE to read about who is already involved and how you can get involved . 

So now you know what sparks joy in me- I’d like you to visualise Change as a form of  decluttering – it’s not necessarily forgetting about the old – but it’s making sure it’s archived so that we can look back as well as forwards and see why it’s so important to keep moving shifting and changing. Let’s make NHS care “Spark Joy” in the people that use it and the ones who work in it .

As a form of reflection think of four things that Spark Joy for you within your own work and life and write about them . 

Thank you for reading 

Jenny ❤️ 

Ps To my grown up children , my family and friends you also spark joy within me and you are and always will be in my heart – thank you ❤️

Being busy as a midwife, Birth, Courage, Discharge from hospital, Kindness, Learning, Midwifery and birth, Newborn, NHS, Patient care, Postnatal care, Skin to skin contact, Teaching, UK Blog Awards 2016, Women's rights

The UK Blog Awards 

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I have entered this years UK Blog Awards in the Health Category to raise the public profile of midwifery in a positive light . 

Compassion is a crucial part of any midwife’s role and I find that blogging helps me to open the window of my midwifery soul through the written word.

It’s crucial that women and families have access to midwifery support now and in the future . Social media is a great way to connect to others and also to learn , inspire and lead. 

You can vote for me BY CLICKING HERE

Thank you for your ongoing support and for reading and sharing my blog . 

With love from Jenny 💛 

 

Courage, Kindness, Learning, Midwifery and birth, NHS, Nursing, Patient care, Teaching

 The gifts we can’t unwrap 

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Christmas and New Year are times when a lot of people seem to dash about . Their focus in this time of the year is to give gifts and to make sure that each gift is exactly right for the person it’s meant for . The New Year can symbolise a new start but for some it might be a time of difficulty and sadness if things have not changed or challenges still exist in their lives . 

It’s pressure sometimes to fulfil this aim and perhaps time to reflect on what other things we give to others throughout the year. So below I’ve written about a few things that I feel are important to give to others . These gifts are all priceless in their own way and can’t be bought but can be shared to help others to feel better about themselves . The gifts can be given to anyone – friends , family , those we care for , those we meet . 

TIME

Giving someone your time might mean helping them in a way you see as small when actually this will make a huge difference to that person . Sending a private message on Twitter, a text , a chat on the phone, a card or a letter  – it might not necessarily mean actually seeing each other face to face – but whatever you do shows the other person you care enough to contact them and let them know they are in your thoughts . I’ve just written an article about the concept of time in relation to midwifery for the January 2016 issue of The Practising Midwife ‘Viewpoint’. 

As humans it’s important to share your time in order to be an part of the way the world works – humans are made to socialise and to care for one another . 

Showing a woman or family that you are caring for that you have time to talk can be displayed in various ways  . As a social or health care worker sitting down at the same level as the person you are communicating with can show equality, empathy and is also a visible sign of listening . An open body language can also improve communication and break down barriers – looking at the person you are talking with means you are committed and have patience to wait for their responses – sitting with someone means connection and it symbolises ‘we are the same ‘ ‘I am here for you’. So many times those in  need require to know that we are committed to hearing what they need to say . 

I know a retired cardiac surgeon who always greets people with “Namaste” and he exudes warmth and kindness – it is a beautiful greeting but when he says it the meaning is real and tangible. He retired many years ago but still gives his time to the hospital to help raise funds and make a difference for others . 

Giving your time to someone else is a wonderful thing to do and it means you value that person well as a fellow human – it will also make them feel good about themself and you might be surprised to find it helps you just as much as them. 

Kindness 

What exactly is kindness ? It’s an understanding and openness that is a way of showing warmth towards someone – it’s asking someone if they are ok , giving a smile or a touch on the shoulder to let them know you care . I blogged about this HERE – on the importance of showing one’s heart .  In the book Roar Behind the Silence edited by Sheena Byrom and Soo Downe and published by Pinter and Martin there are numerous references to compassion and kindness .  Several chapters in the book are structured to help those in healthcare and especially the NHS to investigate the practice in their own place of work. We need to challenge the assumptions of others by putting kindness and compassion at the heart of care . There are many examples and ideas  to try and put these virtues into place in the clinical setting and I urge you to read this book and share it with your colleagues, leaders and managers. 

Hugs and Words 

To receive a hug from a fellow human is a display of care and also of friendship . I’ve received virtual hugs on social media and sent them to others and I do use a hug as a form of greeting to people I know . The other week I met someone in an emotional state and I said “do you need a hug ?” They replied yes & I felt the emotions spilling out of that person – we then talked and the hug helped her . I’m not saying hug everyone you meet but assess the situation and be humankind .  Kindness helps us to thrive . 

When someone wants to talk it’s good to listen and to avoid saying “you need to do this – you need to do that “. Words as a gift should be carefully chosen as most people remember not just the words but the way they are delivered . Think about the way you speak and the language you use does it depict a caring personality ? As a person who like to send letters and cards I try to give positivity through my words I thank my friends for supporting me and I consider how I speak and communicate when I am working. Try reading an email you are about to send to someone as if you are the recipient – how do you feel reading it now ? Would you change anything ? Does your email embody the values of the NHS trust that you are employed in ? Is it true to your beliefs and moral beliefs? 

It’s a good thought to hold in your mind every day that there are people out there who care and that good things are going to happen . If you are feeling low in the New Year tell a friend – contact a support group , go and see your GP – there are organisations, groups and individuals out there specifically trained to help . 

Take the first step , tell someone or if you recognise that someone is not their usual self spend time with them and be kind – you might just be the one who helps them start the journey of becoming well and addressing their problems 

I wish you all a peaceful 2016 – thank you for reading and I’d like to thank all my wonderful real friends I’ve met through Twitter , life and midwifery for all their kindness and positivity towards me in 2015 .   

With love , Jenny ❤️