Being bullied, Courage, Kindness, Midwifery and birth, NHS, Nursing, Women's rights

Speak Out 

Please do not see me as anyone special – my philosophy is to learn and to inspire  others to keep going – against the odds. To help others and to reinforce within myself the understanding that feeling shame is ok , that to be embarrassed is fine and to feel vulnerable is to be human . I am reading Brene Browns book Rising Strong and now realise that it’s ok not to be strong all the time. I try to stay humble and kind. 
Just recently I’ve been reading a lot about hierarchy and what it means . Some say social media does not flatten hierarchy perhaps it doesn’t but it does connect you to people you may never find the time to meet or talk to in person . 

THIS WAS WRITTEN IN 2007 I have heard of stories about bullying in the NHS and I have been on the receiving end – the word bullying to me dehumanises the people who are actually carrying out the behaviour and cruelty they are ‘bullies ‘

In May 2015 Marie Claire Magazine published an article about nursing and the bullying culture CLICK HERE to read – it has many parallels to midwifery . Sadly this issue is talked about and highlighted as wrong but still it continues . 

Jacques Gerrard is   @JacqueGRCM on twitter – Jacques gives a powerful presentation on how bullying and undermining behaviour can affect someone’s work and be detrimental to a midwives’ health. Also Jacques promotes the  RCOG & RCM JOINT TOOLKIT on challenging and identifying bullying behaviour . 

Bullying can include questioning practice , being gossiped about , being marginalised, ostracised Forcing to retrain when not necessary and being  

 given an excessive or inappropriate workload . It can also include things like not being valued for the work you do , and not being supported . It takes immense strength to challenge bullies and to let them see that you are not affected by them when in fact you might be – this is displaying a strong exterior . a person  on the receiving end of bullying may develop mental illness and physical symptoms . The following are some of the effects of being bullied 

…. anxiety, headaches, nausea, ulcers, sleeplessness, skin rashes, irritable bowel syndrome, high blood pressure, tearfulness, loss of self-confidence, various illnesses of the organs such as the kidneys, thoughts of suicide…. 

People who are being bulliied  should be aware that their employer has a duty to protect them and make them safe . The Trade Inion Congress has solid advice on challenging and recognising bullying TRADE UNION CONGRESS – ADVICE TO HELP YOU IF YOU ARE BEING BULLIED –

As today is #SpeakOut day against bullying I’ve been reading on this  ANTI-BULLYING WEBSITE how to train to become an anti-bullying ambassador and this training  involves school children and adults in schools, the workplace and the community . 

It’s time to challenge any form of bullying and to consider how we treat others . Do you value your colleagues or do you snipe about them ? Do you include them or leave them to flounder on unsupported and lonely .

Bullies make up about 20% of the workforce so we can out number them and challenge . Only two weeks ago I saw a fellow colleague blatantly being targeted and I did something about it . Don’t get me wrong it was hard to speak out but once I did I had feedback from others that they had gained courage to speak out . 

It’s time to address the bullies and help them to see that their actions and behaviours can have a  long term detrimental effect on A person , the whole of society and health . If you are beng bullied don’t be a victim speak out , seek advice tell your friends , keep a diary and get some support from your union representative . If you are not in a union join one . 

Let’s all be courageous and make the world a better place to be in 

Thank you for reading 

Jenny ❤️

7 thoughts on “Speak Out ”

  1. Sadly bullying does take place in the NHS. Sometimes it is so Subtle that it is considered “just having a laugh”. But bullying is bullying no person should ever make another feel stupid inferior worthless or undervalued. Please don’t get constructive criticism mixed up with bullying there is a difference. Sadly bullying stays with you for life I know from very first hand experience. Yes it has influenced who I am but it took away my self belief for a very long time and no one has the right to do that. If we can’t do or say something nice or positive then maybe it’s best left unsaid or not done. Remember a frown is just an upside down smile let’s turn them frowns around x

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  2. I was also subject to this at my last trust and, despite escalation to management, it was allowed to go on for 3 years. The investigation, in my opinion, appeared to let it all get swept under the carpet. This affected me, my family and the women I cared for both directly or indirectly. Read Caroline Hasties work highlights this eloquently. In my experience unions and such like are, in part, resigned to the fact that the victim will never win. If it’s the last thing I do, I will
    Ian x

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  3. Jenny,
    Thanks for writing this blog, the subject hits close to home for me. It’s something I’ve experienced and witnessed and I’m at a loss to see why people do it. What is in the psyche of the bullying person, do they even see the damage and hurt they cause, I believe not.
    Keep the faith and take care…
    Jeannine

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